Love

Lord, I come, I confess

Bowing here I find my rest

Without You I fall apart

You're the One that guides my heart

 Lord, I need You, oh, I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need You

Where sins run deep Your grace is more

Where grace is found is where You are

And where You are, Lord, I am free

Holiness in Christ in me

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need You

Teach my song to rise to You

When temptation comes my way

And when I cannot stand I'll fall on You

Jesus, You're my hope and stay

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need You

Lyrics by Matt Maher

Snow Day

We are at the end of February and I am very much so ready for spring!  In my mind, it's been a long winter - which means we have had snowfall and lots of cold, dreary days.  In Brian's mind and the kid's minds; winter has been glorious and they would love more snow days.  Brian's birthday wish was granted and we had snowfall on his birthday this year.  He and the kids had a wonderful time in the snow; having snowball fights and being pulled in the sled.  The weekend after his birthday, we continued the snow-filled-fun at Grandma and Grandpa's house and went sledding and made a snow angel.

happiness and joy

(I aplogize for the lack of photos - I am figuring out a few things and will have photos up by the end of the month!)

Winter has set in; cold days that keep fluctuating with warm afternoons on random days.  There is something about winter that invites us to take stock of where we are in our lives and what our ambitions are for the future.  I've been thinking a lot lately about happiness and where we are in life.

I can honestly say that I don't think I've been happier in my adult life as I am at this time.  (With the exception of the day each of our children were born- pure bliss) We may not have a lot of material things, but that is okay with us - we have been lucky enough to realize in the past few years how little those  things really matter.  We have a lovely, warm, safe home; a healthy(ish) (and doctor's to help along the way) family; a strong network of family and friends who offer support and love; and we have each other.  It sounds simple as I type it out, but that is the bulk of what makes me happy right now.  Brian and I both have jobs with companies we love and see a long career for each of us at the respective companies.  The girls go to a fabulous school that offers so much to enrich their lives.  The values and morals of the school (and most of the families) are in line with the morals and values we try to instill in them at home. 

Have we made sacrifices to get here?  Yes, most definitely.  Are every one of those sacrifices worth it - yes, most definitely.  We are surrounded by media advertising that tries to tell us about products and items that will bring more happiness into our lives.  It can be hard not to lose yourself in those tornadoes of ads.  It has taken a long time for me (and Brian) to build the foundation that helps us not sway too far from our center.  We still have wants, but now we can see them as wants - not needs.  We have all we need and most days :) that is enough.  There are still things we want and those items do bring happiness; but only because they are knit into the rest of our lives.  They don't bring us Joy - just fleeting bits of happiness throughout the day. 

Joy and happiness - two similar but very different emotions.  Happiness comes from things that make you laugh, bring a smile to your face, and warm your heart.  Happiness can also be fleeting.  Joy stems from faith and a sense of being part of something more than life here on earth.  I hope to pass to our children the difference and how to be happy.  I want them to know Joy even in dark times.

The past month I've been overcome with concerns on how to keep our littles safe.  I am haunted by the events of a month ago, and it still brings tears to my eyes when I think of the horrific loss those parents and families and loved ones faced that day.  I would like nothing more than to home school and keep them contained in a "safety" bubble.  I know this is impractical and not possible, and I also know it's not the way we want them to live.  We want them to experience all the Joys and the sadness of life.  We want them to feel safe when they walk out the door and know ways to help keep them safe.  They are the most amazing miracles I know; it's hard to let them out of our grasp.  I want them to know there are more good people than bad in the world and that they are part of the good in this world.  I want them to open their hearts to feel compassion and empathy for others. 

This life we have on earth is wondrous but short.  We need to take stock and see what it is that makes us happy and follow that path.  It's not the same path for everyone, and sometimes that can be hard to see.  We need to feel at peace with our own path to happiness and find Joy in seeing others on their path.  Happiness and Joy; a theme for 2013 perhaps?

Christmas blessings

This Christmas season was one of the best I can remember as an adult.  I would say in my life; but I'm pretty sure it was incredible when I still believed!  It was a longer season and we were able to spend so much time together as a family. 


We were able to make sugar cookies - even with cut outs and iced!, make ornaments, see Christmas lights; spend countless minutes reading and cuddling together.  My favorite part of this season is that the girls were most excited for Jesus's birthday and celebrating by being able to put him in the nativity on Christmas Eve...we are so blessed to have such wonderful children.

It's easy to get swept away in consuming during the holidays, but this year we pulled back and gathered together as a family instead.  These memories are worth so much more than any gift we could buy.  What's even better is that we saw the kids grow closer and enjoy family time even more.

We have a video monitor that is a godsend and has helped us oh-so-much in knowing when we need to go in to William..now!  It also comes in handy when you want to "spy" on your sweet darlings on Christmas morning and delight in their delight of realizing the day had.finally.come!  Little Bella was the first to wake and, as she sat up in bed, we could hear her tiny whisper..."it's good morning time.  Is it good morning time?  Norah, wake up; (Norah sat up in bed, looked at Bella, and laid down again ;))I think it's good morning time!"  She ran to the window to open the blinds and much to her happiness she saw the sunshine..."Norah, it's time!!  It's good morning time and it's CHRISTMAS!!!"  Both Norah and Bella ran out of their room - the sound of their little pitter patter literally will stay with me forever - and looked in the family room.  "He came! He came! It's Christmas!"  Together, they rushed to our room and told us with so much excitement that "Santa came, Mama and Daddy; he really really came!" (Said Norah - oh, melt my heart; I'm so happy she still believes!) "Mama and Daddy, get up, it's Christmas, it is really Christmas!" (Said sweet Bella) 

William was gradually waking at this time, so we helped spur the waking along and got him up too while Bella and Norah ran downstairs to wake up my parents (who lovingly stayed with us for the start of their trip and celebrated Christmas morning with us).  I love that our children SO love their grandparents.  I love that our children have 4 wonderful, loving grandparents! (Thank you Mimi, Papa, Grandpa, and Grandma)

Christmas morning was wonderful, the children loved everything Santa brought and loved helping each other open gifts.  They were so excited that it was finally Jesus's birthday; which makes me oh-so-happy. 

Being a stay-at-home/work-part-time-from-home mom has taught me so many things.  I have learned patience I didn't know I possessed, I have learned to slow down and not rush the kids in getting out the door or leaving the library to fast, I have learned how to multitask like never before - and it's always been something I've done!.  I have also learned that it doesn't take much to make me happy.  I love our small, cozy home filled to the brim with reminders of our families, friends, and daily life.  I love that we are able to gather around the table at dinner every night and take time to eat slowly and enjoy the stories of our days.  I love that our children find eating out to be a treat rather than an every day experience.  I learned to slow down and soak up as many moments of every day as I can....time is slipping away too quickly and I don't want to miss a thing.  I am so blessed to have learned this lesson early on; the love we share and the time we spend together are more important than having a bigger home or going on lavish vacations.  We are surrounded by love and have extraordinary people in our lives - who could ask for more?

I will never forget these memories; our Christmas of 2012.

Giving Thanks

We have so much to be thankful for in our lives.  It is Thanksgiving, and it is a wonderful time to reflect and remember all those reasons to give thanks.  There are so many words I want to write, and it's hard to format them and get them onto paper. 

I am thankful for the smiles on our kids faces when we come home.  I am thankful for their helping hands.  I am thankful for the love I see in them, especially when they are kind and loving to each other.  I am thankful for the millions of hugs and kisses we get and give weekly.  I am thankful for bubble baths, sweet smelling children, and bedtime stories.  I am thankful for their love and adoration of God.  I am thankful for the kindness in their hearts for those less fortunate.  I am thankful for their love and yearning for family.  I am thankful for their desire to learn.  I am thankful for the excitement of anything new in their eyes.  I am thankful for their imaginations.  I am thankful for their forgiveness when I make mistakes.  I am thankful for their artwork and creative minds.  I am thankful for the sound of their gentle breath when they sleep and their beating hearts.  I am thankful for May 8, October 17, and April 18; the days of their births.  I am thankful I get to be their mom.

I am thankful for Brian.  I am thankful he loves me for who I am.  I am thankful for his strong arms and gentle hands.  I am thankful for his job.  I am thankful for the love I see in his eyes for our children.  I am thankful he takes time to play with the kids.  I am thankful for the years we have had together, and the good and bad times we've experienced.  I am thankful for his desire to take care of our family.  I am thankful for his mind and that we have intelligent conversations.  I am thankful for the laughter he brings to our home.  I am thankful for the kindness he has for others.  I am thankful for the immense joy of Christmas he brings to our lives.  I am thankful for his love and belief in God.  I am thankful for all he provides for us.  I am thankful for the way he knows exactly how I like my coffee.  I am thankful for every memory with him.

I am thankful for both our families.  I am thankful for our parents and the love they share.  I am thankful for our siblings and their families.  I am thankful for the copious amounts of love our families have.  I am thankful for the drama, for it shows our devotion to each other.  I am thankful for the laughter and tears.  I am thankful that I will never feel alone in this world because of them.  I am thankful for the love they have for our children, and that they will never feel alone because of them.

I am thankful to God that he has blessed us with so much.  I am thankful that I can see all that we have, even when it seems we don't have much.  I am thankful for my job, and for the ability to stay at home.  I am thankful for all the joy that surrounds us. I am thankful for our home.  I am thankful for friends.  I am thankful for friends who have become like family.  I am thankful there is more good than bad in the world.  I am thankful for all of this and more.  Happy Thanksgiving.

Happy Haunting

I love the enthusiasm kids have for artwork - any kind - their excitement lies in what they can create and it doesn't matter what media is being used.  When we got home from the Pumpkin Fest, we let the kids decorate their pumpkins with paint.  They LOVED it- with a rainbow of paints in front of them, the girls took off each creating their own masterpieces.  This was William's first experience with paint and, as you can see from the photos, he decided to take a taste! 

Busy at work

Laughter and smiles

Realizing he can also paint the table

Our little smurf with his blue streak on his mouth

They did an excellent job and Mommy even joined it on the painting fun - how could I resist?!

I think Norah's looks like a haunted forest

Bella also helped add to William's all blue pumpkin



This year, the girls wanted to trick or treat with friends from school.  It was a great time and so much fun to see how excited they were when we stopped at friend's houses!  William quickly got the hang of how to get candy and was eager to walk to the front door for candy himself! 

Our little dragon

Butterfly Fairy Bella

Butterfly Fairy Norah

Pumpkin Fest

We went to the Pumpkin Fest at school this year - and had a great time!  There were different tables set up so the kids could stamp bags, make cookies, make magnets, have their faces painted, play bean bag toss, and do the duck pond - and many others!  All three of the kids had a great time; it was a perfect afternoon and a great intro into Halloween!

That night, we painted pumpkins and Brian worked with the kids on carving some of our pumpkins.  We had more pumpkins than ever this year - we needed to find a lot of uses for them!

Flowers

Butterflies

Enjoying cookies with Daddy

Choosing his pumpkins

Notre Dame - a family favorite